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Lords of the Wilderness Ch. 1 by ~Mist2393:iconMist2393:



The Half moon shall glow
The three shall come
The kingdom in chaos,
The worlds, in peril.
Peace will come,
When the kind reach their end.

-------------------------------------------------

Kiri was just a normal, fourteen year old girl. She was five feet and two inches tall and most of that was in her legs. She had brown-blonde hair and gold-green eyes. Her face had a look of determination that was accented by two loose strands of almost white hair. The rest of her hair was kept back in a tight ponytail.
Her skin was tanned to a dull gold. She wore baggy t-shirts, jeans, and sneakers constantly. On her right ring finger was a gold ring with two clear crystals and one black crystal. Around her neck hung a golden model of the head of one of her favorite cartoon characters, a gift from one of her friends.
She got A’s and B’s and the occasional C in school, even though everyone thought she could do better. She had a riding lesson every Tuesday and participated in the occasional show her stables put on at holidays. She had several loose friends, but only a few close friends. She could be described as klutzy and slightly on the crazy side, and even though she had her problems, as every high school student does, she was often seen laughing.
Her five closest friends were Shara, Merry, Michi, Jane, and Momo. She had a couple of classes with Momo, one with Michi, and one or two with Merry. Shara and Michi she also met at lunch. Jane wasn’t in any of her classes, since she was a year below everybody else and still in the middle school.
It was mid-October, only a day or so away from Halloween, and so far the weather had been warm and sunny. Kiri sat on her bed next to Momo, who had dark brown, shoulder-length hair that was parted slightly off to one side. Her eyes were also dark brown. She was wearing a light purple shirt and jeans, and a necklace with a guitar hung around her neck. On the floor in front of them was Jane, who had golden blonde hair. Her hair was long and almost pin straight. She had hazel, nearly blue eyes, and was wearing a white t-shirt and jeans. The three friends were hanging out for the day at Kiri’s house. Their plan was to then spend the night at Momo’s house and spend the next day at Jane’s house. Right now they were deciding what to do next.
“We could just sit here and do nothing for a while,” Jane proposed sarcastically.
“Let’s go out into the woods,” suggested Kiri.
“Oooh, yeah,” Jane and Momo agreed eagerly. The three friends stood up and went downstairs to put on their shoes. They walked out the back door and into the woods happily. They were about two feet in when Momo noticed something shining under some leaves.
“That’s strange,” she said quietly to herself.
“What is?” Jane asked as she and Kiri looked to where Momo’s eyes were focused.
“Look at that, it’s….glowing…” replied Momo, pointing. Kiri walked over and picked it up. It was a silver half moon pendant on a silver chain, and indeed it was glowing softly.
“What is it?” Jane inquired, a hint of wonder in her voice.
“It’s a silver half moon pendant on a silver chain,” Kiri replied unhelpfully.
“Well duh,” joked Momo in a sarcastic voice.
“Hey,” Kiri said, sounding hurt. Suddenly the necklace’s glowing intensified until it encompassed the entire area and the three friends were plunged into a white nothingness.
“Um, okay……” Jane whispered slowly.
“That was a mildly interesting turn of events,” added Kiri.
“Guys, where are we?” Momo asked nervously.
“In a giant blob of white nothingness, of course,” replied Kiri.
“Oh, of course. Are you always this optimistic?” Jane asked.
“It’s a gift……and a curse,” answered Kiri jokingly.
“And you’re not worried because…why?” asked Momo.
“Adrenaline. Works wonders on making a person hyper,” Kiri explained. Suddenly the light started fading slowly, and they were thrust into pitch darkness, made even more intense by the fact that their eyes could not adjust.
“Okay, now this is a little scary,” came Kiri’s voice out of the darkness.
“Oh sure, a blob of white light you can handle, but a second of darkness and it’s goodbye Miss Brave!” Jane’s voice said sarcastically.
“Don’t make fun of me, I’m just claustrophobic, that’s all,” Kiri’s voice whined. No one had the chance to reply, however, as all at once the darkness receded and Kiri, Jane, and Momo found themselves standing in a large clearing surrounded by a forest.
©2009 ~Mist2393
:iconmist2393:

Author's Comments

A book I've been working on for a year and a half. This is chapter one. And I know some people are going to hate me, especialy in the later chapters, since I go into great detail about things. I know some people hate that. Me, personally, I like it. So get over it :p

Comments


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:icondark-blood-may:
Advanced Critique:

This needs a lot more work. You need to work with the dialogue a good amount more. Mostly having more ways to say said. I see you use a lot of replied and asked, which you should look for more interesting ways to say that.

I personally don't like the style very much, but I guess if that's a way you like it, then it's okay.

--
>>Michelle<<

I love you, Taylor =]

"You were given the life you live, because someone knew you were strong enough to live it."

:gallery:
[link] <<check it out peas^_^
:iconmist2393:
I'll take that all into account when I edit the printed version :)

--
"Et Earello Endorenna utulien. Sinome maruvan ar Hildinyar tenn' Ambar-metta.

Out of the Great Sea to Middle-earth I am come. In this place will I abide, and my heirs, unto the ending of the world."
:icondark-blood-may:
You're going to do a printed version? As in... try to get it published or something?

--
>>Michelle<<

I love you, Taylor =]

"You were given the life you live, because someone knew you were strong enough to live it."

:gallery:
[link] <<check it out peas^_^
:iconmiluiel-the-friendly:
Yah, I don't see why not. It might need some help, but it sounds intriguing enough to capture my attention. Go for it girl!

My book is sitting in a slump. I haven't had much time to work on it. But oh well.

Yah, a little more work, and I think it will be great!

--
*********************
"I'm not weird, I'm Gifted!"

"Brilliant!"

"Fantastic!"
:iconmist2393:
thanks :)

--
"Et Earello Endorenna utulien. Sinome maruvan ar Hildinyar tenn' Ambar-metta.

Out of the Great Sea to Middle-earth I am come. In this place will I abide, and my heirs, unto the ending of the world."
:iconmist2393:
no, as in I type this on my laptop and every month or so I print wht I have off and edit it, then transfer the edits back onto my laptop. Eventualy I would like to get this published, but I know it needs a lot more work before I do that

--
"Et Earello Endorenna utulien. Sinome maruvan ar Hildinyar tenn' Ambar-metta.

Out of the Great Sea to Middle-earth I am come. In this place will I abide, and my heirs, unto the ending of the world."
:icondark-blood-may:
Yeah... Good luck with that.

--
>>Michelle<<

I love you, Taylor =]

"You were given the life you live, because someone knew you were strong enough to live it."

:gallery:
[link] <<check it out peas^_^
:iconmist2393:
thank you

--
"Et Earello Endorenna utulien. Sinome maruvan ar Hildinyar tenn' Ambar-metta.

Out of the Great Sea to Middle-earth I am come. In this place will I abide, and my heirs, unto the ending of the world."

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